Still part of the learning curve

So, today I am a week removed from being married. How do I feel?

I feel great, of course. In retrospect, I had detached myself long before I made the decision to leave. There was nothing, and I was treated like I was nothing. Not an esteem booster, which led to the struggle.

What struggle, you ask? The one that is always there in everyone - am I good enough, pretty enough, strong enough...basically, am I worth it? My answer is a resounding yes. I am passionate. I may take flights of fancy from time to time. I can be crazy, stubborn, and unreasonable. I am the girl you would like to kiss or choke. I have beautiful curves. I have a sense of unique style. My humor is one of my more fabulous qualities. I am enigmatic. I have a sharp mind. I love unconditionally. I have multitudes of intellectual curiosity.
Now I am able to add that I am independent. Take a good look, world! Hear me roar.

That being said, it's strange to me how complicated some things have to be. My experience with getting cable/internet is a prime example. I called the cable company, did everything over the phone (so I thought), and had everything shipped to me for a self install. I am a direction follower, I can do this! Fast forward a few days and the box has arrived. Great! I pull out the instructions, and I am off running. Hooking up the television...super simple. Took less than 30 minutes. The internet installaton however...what the hell? On paper, looks simple - plug in, turn on, go online, register - so why can't I make this work? I even went to my go to...aka my daughter. She finally even said, " Well Mom, I think you are going to have to call them." So it looks like I will be spending some quality time with the techies at Comcast this week.

Back to the part where I did everything over the phone. I was told once the equipment came, I would have a prepaid label to send back the converter boxes from the house. This meant I had to have little to no contact with the ex. Score! A few days later, I get a call from the ex (oh joy!). He is calling to inform me that I have to go to the Comcast office and sign off the account. By the way, I will have to go on Saturday morning  Am I lucky or what?

Simple is overrated anyway. The more you have to work for something, the more rewarding it is to you in the end. Every time I get overwhelmed, I remind myself of this. I am learning every day. I willingly take on new experiences, whereas before I was reluctant to do so. I am learning to make adventure out of my life. I am past the point where I am worried about what some people may think. Case in point...lately have been singing and even car dancing, and I am well aware people are looking at me. Take me as I am. A little crazy makes for a lot of fun!

More next time.

Until we meet again, my friends.

Angie French