Can't say that I have been in a position to find the answer in a very long time. Divorce is done, good things lie ahead in many forms...smiling is the sugar on top. I wake up and think that each day cannot top the last, but quite often it does.
I am embracing the positive. The negative is not worth a second thought. To those who insist on seeing merely negative...I say why? Life is a gift. Being happy fills you with a wonderful feeling from head to toe. As bad as you perceive your problems to be, someone else has it worse. I guarantee it. I look in the mirror, and happy makes my eyes shine snd skin glow. I have the self confidence that I had when I was a teenager again. So many factors contribute to this.
When I made the decision to leave, it was like a giant weight lifted from my body. The depression was gone in about a week, and I have not looked back.
Onward to bigger, better things. Excelsior!
I am working on a story to share. Once it is complete, I will put it out here. Feedback is a good thing. That's how a writer learns and grows. Something else I love is when you create a piece of poetry or prose for someone special. It conveys emotions that maybe are scary, or you are nervous about saying aloud. For me, I am at my most intimate and vulnerable when giving someone a letter or something I have created. I put all my passion into what I write. It's a gateway down into my soul. That's what I think of when I consider the great writers. I'm not saying that I am a great writer, but I aspire to be.
That's all for today, my friends.
Until we meet again,
Angie
Friday, August 29, 2014
Tuesday, August 19, 2014
7..6..5..4..3..2..1..Finally :)
Good day everyone,
The title is in reference to my divorce. We are just a mere week out from court. I say finally and some of you probably think - well, actually it was quite quick (side note- using 2 Q words together is fun!). For those who have a greater appreciation of the big picture, you know this has been a long time coming.
I am filled with optimism, as this is a lowly stepping stone to what I hope will be some of the best times of my life. At this stage, I enjoy things more. I love discovering who and what I am. I don't have to know what will happen today, tomorrow, next week, next month, or next year. I can live in the now. I can be who I want to be. I can treasure time with all the special people in my life, and realize that it is OK if I don't see them all the time. It doesn't lessen my feelings for them, or their feelings for me.
1 mature adult...coming right up!
On a different subject, let's talk about what is making me happy today. It is also a subject I can discuss at length for hours. The subject you ask? Of course it is my fantastic, fabulous, awesome - and every other synonym for wonderful that you can think of- daughter Jess. She is going to training for her new job. Lucky girl - she is going to coffee school (at least that's what I call it). Today they were sampling, and I was very envious. I know that she can do anything she sets her mind to. I have watched this amazing child grow into an adult, and maturity looks good on her. I also think that someone hit her with the pretty stick. That is something that is hers alone. I may be cute, but she is truly beautiful. If there is a person who is like me in the world, it is her. Poor child...we share the same sense of twisted humor. I love her so much. So I am proud of her...new job, new start.
I'm sure if I was not tired, I would have much more to say. Next time. Wish me luck. This time next week, I will be Angie French once more and single again.
Until we meet again-
Angie
The title is in reference to my divorce. We are just a mere week out from court. I say finally and some of you probably think - well, actually it was quite quick (side note- using 2 Q words together is fun!). For those who have a greater appreciation of the big picture, you know this has been a long time coming.
I am filled with optimism, as this is a lowly stepping stone to what I hope will be some of the best times of my life. At this stage, I enjoy things more. I love discovering who and what I am. I don't have to know what will happen today, tomorrow, next week, next month, or next year. I can live in the now. I can be who I want to be. I can treasure time with all the special people in my life, and realize that it is OK if I don't see them all the time. It doesn't lessen my feelings for them, or their feelings for me.
1 mature adult...coming right up!
On a different subject, let's talk about what is making me happy today. It is also a subject I can discuss at length for hours. The subject you ask? Of course it is my fantastic, fabulous, awesome - and every other synonym for wonderful that you can think of- daughter Jess. She is going to training for her new job. Lucky girl - she is going to coffee school (at least that's what I call it). Today they were sampling, and I was very envious. I know that she can do anything she sets her mind to. I have watched this amazing child grow into an adult, and maturity looks good on her. I also think that someone hit her with the pretty stick. That is something that is hers alone. I may be cute, but she is truly beautiful. If there is a person who is like me in the world, it is her. Poor child...we share the same sense of twisted humor. I love her so much. So I am proud of her...new job, new start.
I'm sure if I was not tired, I would have much more to say. Next time. Wish me luck. This time next week, I will be Angie French once more and single again.
Until we meet again-
Angie
Monday, August 11, 2014
Bloggy blog blog...
Bloggy blog blog...
Fabulous Monday morning. It is more than I could ever ask for to wake up at the beginning of a new week and see opportunity and adventure instead of routine and humdrum boredom. I am even waking in the morning before my alarm goes off AND with a smile on my face. Amazing!
I plan on a great week to be culminated with a spectacular weekend. I really think I must have captured a leprechaun with all the good things and people in my life. My favorite thing is that I always feel like smiling - and I feel pretty.
So, if you find yourself in need of a smile, come see me. I can be cranky from time to time (just ask my mom!), but the more distance I get from my marriage, the better I feel.
I know that I need to sit with my creative juices flowing and work on a few things. I have poetry and a story in the works, and I will share them with you as I finish.
Until next time-
Angie
Fabulous Monday morning. It is more than I could ever ask for to wake up at the beginning of a new week and see opportunity and adventure instead of routine and humdrum boredom. I am even waking in the morning before my alarm goes off AND with a smile on my face. Amazing!
I plan on a great week to be culminated with a spectacular weekend. I really think I must have captured a leprechaun with all the good things and people in my life. My favorite thing is that I always feel like smiling - and I feel pretty.
So, if you find yourself in need of a smile, come see me. I can be cranky from time to time (just ask my mom!), but the more distance I get from my marriage, the better I feel.
I know that I need to sit with my creative juices flowing and work on a few things. I have poetry and a story in the works, and I will share them with you as I finish.
Until next time-
Angie
Saturday, August 2, 2014
Saturday Mornings are for sleeping?
08/02/2014
Good Morning one and all (and yes, it is early Saturday morning).
I somehow managed to sleep a grand total of 3 and a half hours, and lo and behold... I am awake!
I am not just the "let me roll over and think about it" kind of awake. It's the full blown "seriously, what the hell?" kind of awake. Insomnia- it's not just for stress anymore.
I remember the days that I could sleep and sleep, and I woke up feeling refreshed. Even better, I remember those days as a teenager that you woke up around noon, but you had all of those plans that usually carried you into the wee hours of the morning. To quote All in the Family - "Those Were the Days". Life has changed. Sleep begins to change as you get older - at least in my experience, it may be different for others. I find myself at a crossroads. Sleep and I have this love/hate relationship. I have days that I am tired and I can close my eyes and sleep feels like a warm blanket - gently pulling me in, holding me close, and filling my head and body with total relaxation. Other days,trying to sleep is like being a sugar-addled child. You trust that the child will eventually calm itself down, and rest or collapse; yet hours later, the gigantic rush of sugar still courses in your veins. Sleep then teases and taunts. You look at your alarm clock and think, "If I go to sleep now, I will get X amount of sleep." This goes on, sometimes until that alarm clock goes off. Thus your fabulous (not), totally refreshed (really?), unbelievably calm (oh my god) day begins. Isn't it great to be an adult?
So here I am - wide awake. What to do?
I COULD go through the unbelievable amount of stuff that I have been pulling from the house to my new apartment and decide what stays and what goes. But really? At 4:30 am, does this sound like the obvious choice? I could also attempt to go back to sleep - which is a mute point, since I have begun to consume coffee. I am considering a book and a little music. I don't know, but I am thinking I MAY have a book around here to read. For those who know me well, or read my Facebook page...quit your damn laughing already. I have a thing for books. It's the knowledge in general, but I enjoy all aspects and types of literature. I still have all of my German textbooks from college. Can I still read them? Well...sometimes. College dollars at work...German was my minor, which is endlessly amusing to me now. My daughter came home in high school, and asked me for help with her homework when she took German. It was kind of an epic fail on my part.
Yet, I digress. I am still pondering my early morning fate. It is not light outside yet, so a walk is out of the question. I can't ride my stationary bike, because I will wake the neighbors. The cat is looking at me with extreme amounts of attitude. I don't blame her. I don't want to be awake, but sleep is eluding me once again.
So, here I am. I have pretty much determined that reading is going to be the best course of action, now comes the other thing. I am often in the midst of 2 or 3 stories at once. Some say that this is confusing - well, only if you let it be. I have a story for every mood, a literary companion for my ever changing mind. It's just that I like to have a group of companions all at once.
I think I am going old school this morning, and will continue my quest to reread "The Stand". This is one of my favorite Stephen King novels. It's apocalyptic stuff, good versus evil - always a good read. I may mix it up with my guilty pleasure magazine - "Cosmopolitan"....shhhh, that's our little secret. I enjoy all the articles, and no, I am not just reading it for the ones that talk about sex. Jeez. You guys are a bunch of pervs. Really? Get your mind out of the gutter.
So, that's where I am at 4:54 am on a Saturday morning. Living La Vida Loca. Don't you wish you were me?
Until we meet again, my friends-
Angie
Good Morning one and all (and yes, it is early Saturday morning).
I somehow managed to sleep a grand total of 3 and a half hours, and lo and behold... I am awake!
I am not just the "let me roll over and think about it" kind of awake. It's the full blown "seriously, what the hell?" kind of awake. Insomnia- it's not just for stress anymore.
I remember the days that I could sleep and sleep, and I woke up feeling refreshed. Even better, I remember those days as a teenager that you woke up around noon, but you had all of those plans that usually carried you into the wee hours of the morning. To quote All in the Family - "Those Were the Days". Life has changed. Sleep begins to change as you get older - at least in my experience, it may be different for others. I find myself at a crossroads. Sleep and I have this love/hate relationship. I have days that I am tired and I can close my eyes and sleep feels like a warm blanket - gently pulling me in, holding me close, and filling my head and body with total relaxation. Other days,trying to sleep is like being a sugar-addled child. You trust that the child will eventually calm itself down, and rest or collapse; yet hours later, the gigantic rush of sugar still courses in your veins. Sleep then teases and taunts. You look at your alarm clock and think, "If I go to sleep now, I will get X amount of sleep." This goes on, sometimes until that alarm clock goes off. Thus your fabulous (not), totally refreshed (really?), unbelievably calm (oh my god) day begins. Isn't it great to be an adult?
So here I am - wide awake. What to do?
I COULD go through the unbelievable amount of stuff that I have been pulling from the house to my new apartment and decide what stays and what goes. But really? At 4:30 am, does this sound like the obvious choice? I could also attempt to go back to sleep - which is a mute point, since I have begun to consume coffee. I am considering a book and a little music. I don't know, but I am thinking I MAY have a book around here to read. For those who know me well, or read my Facebook page...quit your damn laughing already. I have a thing for books. It's the knowledge in general, but I enjoy all aspects and types of literature. I still have all of my German textbooks from college. Can I still read them? Well...sometimes. College dollars at work...German was my minor, which is endlessly amusing to me now. My daughter came home in high school, and asked me for help with her homework when she took German. It was kind of an epic fail on my part.
Yet, I digress. I am still pondering my early morning fate. It is not light outside yet, so a walk is out of the question. I can't ride my stationary bike, because I will wake the neighbors. The cat is looking at me with extreme amounts of attitude. I don't blame her. I don't want to be awake, but sleep is eluding me once again.
So, here I am. I have pretty much determined that reading is going to be the best course of action, now comes the other thing. I am often in the midst of 2 or 3 stories at once. Some say that this is confusing - well, only if you let it be. I have a story for every mood, a literary companion for my ever changing mind. It's just that I like to have a group of companions all at once.
I think I am going old school this morning, and will continue my quest to reread "The Stand". This is one of my favorite Stephen King novels. It's apocalyptic stuff, good versus evil - always a good read. I may mix it up with my guilty pleasure magazine - "Cosmopolitan"....shhhh, that's our little secret. I enjoy all the articles, and no, I am not just reading it for the ones that talk about sex. Jeez. You guys are a bunch of pervs. Really? Get your mind out of the gutter.
So, that's where I am at 4:54 am on a Saturday morning. Living La Vida Loca. Don't you wish you were me?
Until we meet again, my friends-
Angie
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